Today we discussed this article:
Girl, 12, told she can't play ball with boys
You play ball like a girl.
That used to be an insult. In Beaverton, Oregon, it's becoming more like a fantasy.
Jaime Nared, a 12-year-old girl who stands 6-foot-1, has been told she can no longer play on the boys team of which she has been a member since the second grade, according to a report on the Web site of The Oregonian. Curiously, the timing of her ban came in the wake of a 30-point effort against an all-boys team.
"She scored 30 points," Jaime's mom, Reiko Williams, told The Oregonian. "I remember one play. She stole the ball, dribbled up court and made a behind-the-back pass to a teammate. He missed the lay-in, and she grabbed the rebound and put it in. I think it was just too much for some of those parents.
"The next day, she came home and said they wouldn't let her play with the boys anymore."
Last month, a group of parents from an opposing team told management at The Hoop, a private Beaverton basketball facility that runs the league in which Nared's team competes, that they didn't like Nared playing against their sons. Hoop officials then told Nared's coach, Michael Abraham, that she could no longer play, citing a league rule that prohibits mixed-gender teams, the newspaper reported.
"I never saw the rule," said Abraham, who has coached basketball for 32 years.
"If I'd known about it, I wouldn't have put any of my teams in the league. Besides, she's been playing on this team since second grade, and she plays on our team when we travel around the region. There's never been any problem in any event, not one word of complaint."
Neal Franzer, The Hoop's director of operations, told the paper that parents were "adamant" their complaints had nothing to do with Jaime's skills.
"They said the problem was the boys were playing differently against her because she was a girl," Franzer said, according to the paper. "They'd been taught to not push a girl, so they weren't fouling her hard, and the focus had shifted from playing basketball to noticing a girl was on the floor with them.
"The rule may not have been enforced in past years," Franzer said. "We have new management this year. It's policy, and we enforce policy."
Nared, however, had a different take.
"I think the boys on a specific team don't like me," she said. "It doesn't seem fair."
Abraham was also skeptical about the ruling.
"I can't think of one boy that we've played against that's had a problem with her," he said. "Maybe their dads do. Teach the boys how to handle her. Front her, deny her the ball. You sure as hell don't complain. Listen, she's a girl's girl, but she plays tough. She's no cupcake. She gets knocked down and takes a charge."
Do you think what happened to Jaime was fair? Many of the Sisters didn't think so. Some thought it was an ego thing. Some thought boys didn't like being one-upped by a girl. Some thought that maybe it's how boys are socialized to not play roughly with girls. As one teacher sister said, "If we have real equality, it shouldn't matter." But it does. And we agreed that this was a sad way to exit a team she'd been on for years.
Have you ever been discriminated against for your gender? Have you ever been judged, based on your gender? What was that like for you?
One Sister said that when we have to prove ourselves against boys, it makes us STRONGER. Have you experienced that?
Do you think girls are tougher than boys? And maybe boys have to be tough because of how they're socialized? Is that fair? We all know the unwritten rule of 'boys don't cry.' (There's an awesome song by The Cure with that title, but I digress...)
Why does gender have to matter so much?
7 comments:
When I was young, girls didn't really participate in sports at all. We did things like the Drill Team, played in the band, Cheerleading, but no competitive sports. I think you are all lucky to have so many athletic opportunities today as girls. Take advantage of them!! Don't let anyone or anything stop you if it's something you are passionate about!
Submitted by an old teacher! Ha!
Prejudice is bad. We know that. Girls are just as tough as guys, etc. But if I'm a girl and I prefer traditional "girl things" like art and writing instead of sports, does that mean I'm being weak and submitting to sterotypes? Not that anyone here actually is, but I think we need to be careful not to let things go the other way.
No. You are not being weak you are being yourself. Good job. Just like girls can't play football guys can't dance. (exept hip-hop) I like both traditional girly things and guy things. I believe that girls can do anything.
I believe girls AND guys can do anything.
You know how sometimes boys feel they can't cry--I don't think that that's completely true. Take a death in the family or something like that--it's the mom that has to be strong and not cry, isn't it?
Lots of girls that I know want to do sports, but their schools only have guys teams, so they aren't allowed to participate in the things they love to do. But this goes the other way, too. I have a guy friend, and he's really into hip-hop dancing. His school has a dance team, but they won't let him join because he's a guy. Fair? No.
But just because you aren't into that stuff, it doesn't make you weak, not at all! It makes you you . It's not weak, its individuality.
Thats happened to me before, what Nared is going through. I played for this all boy team. I went through tryouts and was the best one there. The coach then came up to me and said "Why don't you go draw a picture instead of play with my boys," I was so mad. I looked him straight in the eye and said, "I'll go against your best boy here. If I win I stay, if he wins I'll go." He smiled and said "Roy, get out here!" Roy was a big bulky center, but I was lean and quick and I beat him. I made the team but after tryouts quit and joined another team. On that team we beat the first team i tryed out for in the championship, me scoring 25 pionts.
After the game I went to shake the coach's hand and he wouldn't. I was really mad but I kept my cool.
looking around at boys with their guy friends makes me think guys have more fun than girls... perhaps its because everyone has more fun than me? anyway, it really just depends on what kind of person they are, not their gender. when you look at someone, dont look at their appearance, race or ethnicity. look at their expression, personality, and attitude.
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